Based on the nine personality types on the Couples’ Personality Index (CPI), there are forty-five possible personality pairs. The strengths and challenges of each personality pair are explained on this website. To find out about any of the forty-five personality pairs, click on the Personality Pairs dropdown menu at the top of any page.
This page takes a closer look at the relationship between two people whose Personality Triads have the Physical Connector Core. This Triad includes the Physical Changemaker and Social Explorer Bodyguards.
For every personality pair discussion, the names “Sam” and “Alex” will be used for easy reference. These names are intended to be gender-neutral as any gender can have any personality type.
Falling in love
We experience falling in Love through the Explorer part of our Personality Triad, regardless of whether the Explorer is our core personality or one of our Bodyguards.
In this Personality Pair, both Sam and Alex have the Physical Connector Triad which includes a Social Explorer Bodyguard.
Because neither Sam nor Alex has the Explorer as a Core Personality, both of them are willing to let real life distractions poke holes in the romantic bubble at any point in the relationship.
How close they feel during the honeymoon phase depends on how active their Social Explorer Bodyguards are.
The Social Explorer Bodyguard in each of their Personality Triads anchors love in the feeling of having someone by their side, and the mutual choice to share the dance of life with one another.
The fact that love means the same thing to both of them makes the honeymoon phase feel perfect as long as they both are embracing the experience of falling in love.
If they do embrace love in this early stage of their relationship, it creates a foundation of closeness they can revisit as the relationship progresses, any time they feel at risk of drifting apart.
If their Social Explorer Bodyguards are not developed or active, the honeymoon phase of their relationship is likely to fall flat, with each of them eager to get back to the individual productive lives that give them a sense of purpose.
Regardless of what happens throughout the honeymoon phase, once it is over, life goes back to normal. For Physical Connectors, that means living by choices that leave their corner of the world better than they found it.
Compatibility
Feeling compatible with someone happens when our Core Personality, no matter which personality type it is, feels fully accepted by the other person. If our core personality feels pressured by the other person to change in any way, that feeling of compatibility starts breaking down.
In this Personality Pair, both Sam and Alex have the Physical Connector Triad which includes a Physical Connector Core.
Sam and Alex’s Physical Connector Core prioritizes keeping life streamlined and safe. They generally appreciate structure and rules in every aspect of their life. If either one is making risky choices or breaking laws, their partner would expect them to change their behavior to fit in with society’s standards.
This relationship is likely to be defined by mutual respect and consideration for one another’s boundaries. However, the Physical Connector Personality shared by Sam and Alex appreciates balance in every aspect of life, including relationship. Sam and Alex both want a partner who brings something to the table that balances out what they themselves bring. So if their partner is too similar to them, they are likely to feel disappointed.
Although neither Sam nor Alex is likely to make it obvious that they are impacted by any expectations their partner has of them to change what they do naturally, it can be difficult to avoid internalizing the feeling that they are not enough. Every time they take that hit, any feeling of compatibility that exists in the relationship also takes a hit.
This Personality Pair is a perfect example of a match that looks great on paper, but would not be happy in real life. Two Physical Connector Personalities are not likely to pick each other or feel happy in the long run. They want the magic that comes with effortless surprises from a partner who makes life feel safe and exciting at the same time.
Conflict
Communicating that we want something to be different in a relationship usually falls on the Changemaker part of our Personality Triad, regardless of whether the Changemaker is our Core Personality or one of our Bodyguards.
In this Personality Pair, both Sam and Alex have the Physical Connector Triad which includes a Physical Changemaker Bodyguard.
The Physical Changemaker Bodyguard in Sam’s and Alex’s Triads is one of the most forceful personality types on the Couples Personality Index. As an active Bodyguard, it can project a combative energy that temporarily takes over the Core Personality. The Physical Changemaker is extremely sensitive to having its power threatened, and welcomes opportunities to exercise control.
If either Sam or Alex’s feels that their partner is responsible for something important going wrong in their life, that is likely to trigger the confrontational and physically intimidating energy of their Physical Changemaker Bodyguard.
However, the Physical Changemaker Bodyguard is generally well managed by the Physical Connector Core, keeping the Physical Changemaker Bodyguard from impulsively reacting to triggers. If either Sam or Alex is not happy with something their partner is doing, the Physical Connector Core usually maintains a cool, calm and collected demeanor, communicating what they want in very practical terms.
If their partner does not respond as they hope, they might begin to feel and express agitation, allowing the Physical Changemaker Bodyguard to emerge.
Whoever is on the receiving end of the outburst is likely to stay calm and detached, focused on de-escalating their partner and managing whatever triggered their partner’s reaction in the first place. The Physical Connector Personality shared by Sam and Alex is generally composed, articulate and reasonable. This couple can be expected to resolve their conflicts with decorum and thoughtfulness.
In this Personality Pair, most disagreements are likely to dissipate quickly. However, if either Sam’s or Alex’s Physical Changemaker Bodyguards is triggered, even one reactionary moment can cause permanent damage to the relationship. The Physical Connector Personality puts a very high value on a home feeling safe physically and emotionally.
A relationship between two Physical Connectors is surprisingly fragile. This Personality Pair is not very likely to happen in the first place. And if it does, staying together may be more for appearances than for love.
Fitting into the World
The approach we take to finding our place in the world is handled by the Connector part of our Personality Triad, regardless of whether the Connector is our Core personality or one of our Bodyguards. The more active the Connector element in our Personality Triad (whether it is a Core or a Bodyguard), the more important it is to us that our relationship act as bridge between who we really are and how the world perceives us.
In this Personality Pair, both Sam and Alex have the Physical Connector Triad which includes a Physical Connector Core.
Because the Ideas Connector in the Triad shared by Sam and Alex is their Core Personality, it is very important to both of them that the relationship acts as a bridge between who they are and how the world perceives them.
The Physical Connector Personality shared by Sam and Alex is inclined to see the relationship as an important puzzle piece in the tangible reality of a full life. Any partner behavior that does not reflect loyalty and dependability fractures the relationship puzzle piece that the Physical Connector is trusting to stay whole.
Both Sam and Alex are apt to make every effort to meet their partner’s Connector needs. The Physical Connector Personality they share has a strong work ethic and sense of fairness that tends to make them expect more of themselves than they expect of anyone else.
Having the same Connector element means that Sam and Alex have parallel perspectives on the Connector role that their relationship plays in their lives. However, for this Personality Pair, understanding and fulfilling their partner’s Connector needs are two separate things.
For Physical Connectors, part of what makes live worth living is the beautiful feeling that comes when so many different pieces fall into place. Physical Connectors want to be part of a relationship puzzle that holds the promise of synergy they have never known before. Committing to live their life with another Physical Connector simply does not offer the best opportunities to do that. ©
